Death on a First Date

( An unsent letter to... Lady Petronilla. )

( Unsent letter to his father )

Weddings! Truly joyous occasions for all. I trust all decent citizens will be attending mine. I trust all indecent citizens will be staying away.

[Actual message to Petronilla]

I believe I have to come and try some new hose on.

Your daughter will be there, won't she?

[OPEN SPAM LATER - multiple me, if you like. One is reserved for Victor, though.]

[Eddie is running away. Into the woods. Half dressed in hose, and with a ripped shirt. He's a bit less skinny and a bit more Disney-Prince than usual. He jumped out of a window in an act of derring-do and is now on the run from his future mother-in-law and numerous other people. He has no idea where he's going, or how to survive without a manservant, and in any other circumstances, would die.

Unless someone magically appears to help him out...]

((ooc: Edward, for reference, is a visiting prince from a nearby poxy little tinpot kingdom, and is desperately trying to get out of his arranged marriage, 'cause he loves some cheery, lovely peasant girl. Feel free to assume you're invited/know anyone involved, etc. Go nuts. If you want in/have nothing to do with a variety of female characters for the purposes of plot, come bug me. Otherwise peasant girl/future wife etc will be assumed.

It's canon. But not as you know it.))

[Backdated to just before the end of the flood]

...I hate this flood. I really, really hate this flood.

[PRIVATE TO SVETA]

How. How do you put up with her? How?

She's more demanding than Violet. Than Violet's mother! Than... GAH. [just frustration and then....

Oh, it's over.]

Come get your inmate. Please. Please.

[Private to Jane]

I am entirely fed up and am going to get tauping Limed.

Are you joining me?

Petronilla is crazier than... she's just crazy!

[Filtered away from Victor]

To make you all aware, for the next few days, my inmate will not be able to see who he is talking to. So please don't get angry if he doesn't recognise you - it's deliberate.

I, on the other hand, will be able to see who everyone is. If you abuse him, or treat him badly, just because you think he can't tell who you are - I will know, and I will step in. It won't be tolerated.

[sigh]

I'd also appreciate it if you didn't all automatically identify yourselves, as it kind of removes the point.

[Warden filter]

Alright, I know there's a flood on and if anyone's not themselves and knows it... wait to respond?

I need your cooperation, on quite a massive scale, to be perfectly honest, and I need to explain what's going on:

I'm going to be restricting my inmate's journal access, probably tomorrow, but in an unusual (apparently) way.

I want to restrict him to text and make all replies to him anonymous (am I using that right?). It has a purpose, I swear.

The problem is that I imagine some people will take advantage of this to insult him. I will be watching these conversations constantly, and I will be able to see who is who.

But I'd appreciate it if you could discourage your inmates from, um, [there is no word for 'trolling' in his vocabulary] antagonising him just because they're anonymous. It's not really an opportunity for everyone to come in and say what they really think of him - but for him to talk to people without his prejudices am I using that right getting in the way.

I hope this works.

[Private to Sarah]

I'm especially worried about your inmate.

[Private to Victor]

Victor, as of tomorrow, I'm placing a new restriction on your communications. Only for a few days, maybe even one day.

This might seem harsh, but it serves a purpose, and is not a punishment. It has never been a punishment.

I'm going to make it so you can't see who's responding to you, and you will receive everything as text. I will not allow for people to abuse you, don't worry about that, I'll be able to see who's who and keep track of it.

[Private to the Admiral]

As of tomorrow, can you please make it so my inmate can only receive text - all other posts should be transcripted for him. Can you also make it so he can't see who is replying to him, but I can? Also, he should always be able to see me and talk to me, in any medium.

Make this last for tomorrow and Thursday. I... might ask for less, or maybe more time, it depends.

If the only way you could have total freedom within a society is to be literally invisible to that society, would you consider it worth it? If it took to technically not exist to be able to live by your own rules, would you want that?

Or would it be too lonely? Is there any point in that freedom when you can't share it with anyone, and you're left as an observer to a society where nobody else had any freedom at all?

[Wardens-Eddie-likes filter (doctors, Howie and other officious types excluded. George is in, though)]

There's... some concepts I'm not entirely sure of the meaning of, and after talking to my inmate, I think it's quite important to understand them.

God, and the afterlife.

I've talked to a few people, and no offence, they seem to have done their best to explain it, but it seems a little fuzzy still.

Is god a physical person? If so, why is he a god above everyone else? If not, why do people call themselves goddesses here? What's the difference between people who say there's one god, and those who say there's lots, responsible for different things? Which one's right?

Are both right? Are none right?

Is the afterlife just... something the Previous think happens after death, or is it something specific? Why would someone say this place wasn't the afterlife... when it's clearly, um, after life? For the dead people, anyway.

[Private, seperately, to Sveta and Martha - video]

[Eddie comes on screen.] Hi. I found something and... I thought you might be able to tell me what it was about.

[He holds up a copy of a Ishihara test]

We found this in the library, and me and Jane can see different things in it. Why might that be? What's the purpose of this?

[Kitchen filter]

Could you spare me a piece of meat, by any chance? You probably won't get it back.

[Lab staff-folks]

My inmate wants to do an experiment, and if I'm supervising and he wants to come in to do something, is that alright? He's not doing anything dangerous, and I'll make sure nothing's taken.

[Private to Victor.]

I've asked for some meat, for that experiment you wanted to do. You can have the day off from work to do it, so pick whenever suits you.

If you met my dad?

I've got nothing to apologise for, or be angry about, or curse his name for. I just hope you liked him. He's a good Swatchman.

[Warden filter, minus infirmary staff, and Narvin.]

A certain... recent incidents have made me wonder something.

Does anyone come from a world where it's acceptable to kill others if they're going to die a potentially long, drawn out, horrific death? By which I mean kill using medicinal means, with given permission and consent. Not just... using a instant-kill-gun and shooting them.

Also, I will consider anyone who informs my inmate that I asked this question as officially undermining my position.

On another note, does anyone have an inmate who's left and then returned?

[Private to Jane]

Do not mention the Green Room. Especially to Victor.

Also, Scarlet Pimpernel?

[Private to Victor]

Alright. Let's discuss Rex.

[Private to Rex]

Would you mind if I asked you a few questions about Victor?

[Coma-investigation Filter]

I'm working on a questionnaire right now. I'll have something ready very soon. Looks like we need it.

[Private to the Admiral]

Can I have three things delivered to my room, please?

1) A Travelling Swatch, like my father's. One of each colour is necessary, but exclude the Greed. Or things will go straight to brown.

2) One merit book, uncoloured and empty.

3) One valise, also empty, and with a lock.

Thank you in advance.

p.s. if some more lightglobes are possible, I would be grateful.